Easter… We have got this!

As Easter approaches I find myself unsure of how I feel. I am excited to still be able to watch my kids hunt for Easter eggs, because thankfully our bulk barn did online pick up, at the same time I find myself a little sad.

I am sad that I wasn’t able to get the ‘Extras” new books, or skipping ropes and bubbles. Normally I like to get them some sort of outside toy to celebrate spring time. It is in the back of my head that I feel I am failing as a mother because I can’t get the things that I normally can, but at the same time I know that I am doing the best I can in this new world that we are living in right now.

I am sad that we wont be able to do our big family dinners that we normally do with the extended family. Dinner at my moms with the big turkey and the big Easter egg hunt that she puts on every year for the kids. My dad’s where he always gets them so much outdoor toys to keep them entertained for the spring and summer. My grandma where her hugs can cure anything I swear.

I am sad that when my youngest keeps asking “Why can’t we go see them for just a minute” “I promise I wont get close to them” then I have to continue to remind him that we just simply can’t right now and explain to a 4 year old, who really doesn’t understand how a virus works.

I am sad that all my kids birthdays will be effected from this virus and there is nothing I can do about it. I can’t stop it. I can’t say “go away, so that my babies can have their birthdays” I am going to do my hardest to make sure that they have the best birthdays under the circumstances but I know that it just wont be the same. Bowling and space dance parties without their friends.

I am sad that I canceled on friends before this because I would give anything to see them right now, I need them.

As parents, we are going to have to figure out how to adapt to the world that is falling apart due to a virus that is just taking over the world. As parents we have to make sure that we protect our kids physically and mentally, but well let’s face it we have no idea what really is going on ourselves. We have to at the same time protect ourselves physically and mentally in order to protect them.

Stay positive

I get it, trust me it is really hard to stay positive when you are so scared yourself. Not to mention your kids driving you up the wall and back down again. Thinking about how a cabin in the woods, just you and nature would feel right about now. I find what work’s best here is using my words wisely and they will more then likely work… so instead of saying “Ugh, stop making such a mess” say “Can you please pick up your toys” They are just as stressed as you are. Their tiny lives have been flipped upside down too. Yelling at them will just make you upset and them upset and everyone’s crying and stressed.

Structure

Everything is up in the air right now, and no one know when this will end. Letting everyone just go hog wild in the house for months, is just going to cause everyone to be a hot mess and you drinking out of the wine bottle. I know as parents, moms. We want to sleep in. We dream about more sleep. I found if I set my alarm got up and had my coffee before the mayhem started I have a better day. I have started to get my body back to normal routines. Get your kids up, have breakfast, their showers and their school work. Have their meal times and bedtime routines as normal. Children have a healthier life with a structured life.

Behaviour

Kids are going to be testing our patience a lot more during this time. They know what set’s us off. I get that this time is stressful for them, but at the same time we need to make sure that they know that their behavior is now okay. We have always been their teachers even while they were in school. We need to make sure that they grow up to be respectful human beings. Consequences help teach our children responsibility for what they do. We will hear a lot of “You aren’t my teacher, I don’t need to learn that” they will have more break downs because they are stressed and are still learning how to use their emotions. Small body big emotions. Teach them how to express themselves and let us know whats going on in their little minds because negative outbursts.

Always take a minute for yourself. If you feel like screaming, if you feel like you are about to loose your cool. Go take a minute. Breathe. and come back to it.

You are not alone

Millions of parents out there are trying to figure this out too. Contact your mommy friends and vent to them. Tell them “Girl ima sell these kids to the zoo” I am 100% sure they will agree and say “maybe they will do a deal with more kids, I will drop mine off too” go on some mommy support groups.
Take a break. When the kids are asleep. Have that nice relaxing bath. Go sit outside with a book. Avoid social media with all those news outlets, people sharing all these things about the virus that is sending your blood pressure out the window. You need to separate yourselves from hearing about it all together to settle, to destress.

Talk to your kids about it

I know we are all trying to figure it out. We don’t know whats going on either. Your kids look to you for safety and reassurance that everything will be okay and that everything one day will go back to some what of a normal life. Being silent and not talking about it does not help your child. Listen to their questions and answer them to the best of your ability. Ask them open questions about how they are feeling about this whole situation. If they don’t feel like talking about it, that’s okay. Just let them know that you are here when they feel like talking.

We are all in this together. We can get through this, I know it. It is after 6 so it is time for wine!

Cheers parents, Stay safe, we have got this!

Mom Shaming…

Mom shaming has always been a thing, now that social media is huge it has gotten worse or its just put in the spot light because of social media. Honestly to me I feel like its just another way to bully just with a different word. The thing is what people mom shame for is something that they have done or will do once they become a parent . Some of the things that people are shaming for are ridiculous.

For example Meagan Markle the Duchess of Sussex has been in the spot light for some time since she gave birth to her very handsome son Archie. While I understand that they are royals and people are always watching them, But I think the media needs to settle the EFF down. The newest one right now is that she wasn’t holding Archie right, and she didn’t have a hat on him. GOOD LORD give me a break. While breastfeeding my daughter I dropped my phone on her head. She was perfectly fine, mind you she gave me the dirtiest look but never let go of the nipple!

Mom shaming, Dad shaming, Parent shaming needs to end! like yesterday. I cannot stress this enough parenting is hard and it doesn’t help that other moms or other dads sit there on their high horse pretending like they are better then everyone else.

Okay Jackie I get it you feed your child all the healthy food in the world, great thats YOUR parenting… love it! But if Stacy wants to feed her child something completely different then you… PERFECT! Her child is fed and happy. Why the frick does it matter?? Breastfed or Formula fed or both, THEIR BABY WAS FED!! I don’t care what you do as long as that baby is healthy and happy.

Take Kim Kardashian West for example, She got mom shamed because her daughter was wearing make up? DO y’all know the background to that? Maybe her daughter wants to be just like mommy, Beautiful! So it’s okay to put nail polish on babies and their ears done but heaven forbids her wearing make up?? We have some double standards up in here.

So many parents have pictures of their kids that they want to post on social media, me including. That we are to scared to post… oh the floor isn’t has clean as I would like it, oh my child’s doing something that I know ONE person would frown upon it. Celebes rarely have a choice in the matter of what gets posted or not but they shouldn’t be ashamed of their parenting. Yes they have a whole different life style then us being always in the spot light, but they are human just like us. Why should we stop of sharing our kids crazy moments because Jackie the PTA mom wouldn’t approve. So your child ate a fruit loop that you missed when sweeping, meh they will survive! Clearly tell them dude the 5 second rule was up on that one, but its not the end of the world.

As parents in this crazy world we need to stick together. What happened to the village raising the kids? Clearly that went out the window. Now it’s what that lady struggle in the grocery store while their child is freaking out and judge from afar instead of “Hey hun, let me help” or “I see you! been there hun” Nope we judge that mom that forgot snacks for soccer game because she was juggling so much and simply JUST FORGOT!

Carrie underwood! The amazing singer and song writer got mom shamed for WEARING MAKE UP! She was all dolled up and beautiful like always for her sons soccer game. Apparently thats a no no. Girl be you!

Honestly we are damned if we do and damned if we don’t. No matter what there is someone out there that is not going to approve of your lifestyle or your parenting but its time that we ban together, and put this parent shaming to rest once in for all! I want to know what they all get out of it, shaming someone else for their choices? Where does that get you? You have just become a different type of bully. Worse even. Kids do crazy things thats unavoidable. There is no manual to every single kid. The parenting books don’t tell you that your child will eat dirt or play in the toilet when you aren’t looking. Post those pictures that you feel someone will shame you for and watch a lot of parents be like “HA! Right, Candace did the same thing last week!” because you know what we have all been there or will be there. Even if you try your HARDEST you can’t watch them 24 7 like they are the president. They are sneaky and fast! Like little ninjas.

Girl I see you! we are all in this together!