When I had my first child, I had it in my head that I was going to do everything right. I was going to buy her all name brand clothes, I was going to do all organic foods or even make all my own baby foods in the jars with the perfect little labels and dates. Honestly I tried my hardest to do all those things. Life got in the way of that. I got lost in the trying to make a sweet, crying every night baby happy. Waking up several times at night to breastfeed, that I was way too tired to even think about baby food or jars. Sometimes I was way too tired to even remember if I ate that day.
I read all the baby books you can think of. Googled everything under the sun. All great books, but nothing can prepare you fully at becoming a mother. At this point it is really “How to keep your child alive without fully losing your damn mind in the process” which scared the crap out of me because I could barely keep a houseplant alive how can I keep a tiny version of myself alive.
Second child came and I was more laid back. I came to the conclusion that all name brand clothing was just not going to happen. They grow like weeds. I swear they grow every time they put one scoop of food in their mouths. Side note: WHY ARE THEY ALWAYS HUNGRY!
My kids food schedule;
Snack, breakfast, breakfast snack, snack, lunch, lunch snack, snack, sometimes too full to eat dinner, complains they didn’t have dinner, dinner, dinner snack, snack, bedtime snack, snack… thinking about food while they are sleeping… Repeat.
Third child, at this point he’s like a free range chicken. I have been there and done that and bought a t-shirt. To say that I am a pro at parenting no, because I don’t think that is even a thing. What I can say is that I do know the just of it. I am not trying to be that perfect parent that I set out to be because it does not exist.
There are so many rules. What you can and cannot do as a parent. So much judgement out there. What grinds my gears is the parents shaming parents. Kids eating cold french fries off the car floor HAPPENS. You will be driving and hear “Cold french fries taste yummy mommy” while they fish for that fry that you missed out of their car seat. They will stand at the big bay window in the living room and wave to your neighbor butt naked, with a shirt on their head because they are like ninjas and sneak away while you are finding something for them to wear. They will fart in a restaurant while the waiter is asking what would you like on the menu.
They will become a thirsty, hungry philosopher at bedtime, because they refuse to go to sleep. JUST in case they miss something. Nope all they will miss is me eating a whole cheese cake with a fork, binge watching grey’s anatomy.
All these things do NOT and I will repeat. DO NOT make you a bad parent. It makes you a real one. Stuff happens. Kids have no filters. They are these balls of stressful, wonderful joys. That will make you wonder about every life choice you made. There is no way to be a perfect parent because I promise you, your kids won’t let that happen and it does not exist.
One thing I do know. Is that you are perfect for them. They want you. Every little piece of you. While you are in the kitchen getting them several snacks. While you are in the laundry room changing the laundry over that you smell because you totally forgot to change the laundry over. Banging on the bathroom door because all of a sudden they have several questions and fruit snacks for you to open.
They just want YOU. So rock that perfect imperfect parenting. We are all in this together.